Wed. Sept. 18


 

Well this weekend I finally tried some acid & it was really fun but it took
so long to come down & I had to be home. No bad trip or scary
hallucinations, the only thing that scared me was not coming down in time
to talk to ma. I was up for about 18 hours. It was really beautiful when I
wasn't worried, though. I dropped at about 3:30 in the morning Saturday
night. Cigarette smoke was mother-of-pearl, & when I went outside & lay on
my back the stars were like a TV set, moving around & forming words--which I
couldn't read.

Lolly's face turned color & we listened to Frank Zappa over & over. I could
feel the ground under me like the ocean's tide. When it got light out, I
could see the plants & trees in the woods were all perfectly, symmetrically
designed & absolutely gorgeous. I acted really selfish because I totally
forgot myself & "how to act polite" hangups. My sense of smell & feel were
kind of numbed--I could smell & feel, but it seemed as if I did it with my
brain instead of my nose & my body.

All the time while I was tripping, I was realizing that the very people I
was with--Fries, Lolly, Gay-were wasting their lives & were going to end up
as has-beens. I was on that same road. I've got to have fun, but do nothing
to jeopardize my future. School & being straight are just as fun or more
fun than being stoned if I make them that way. I shouldn't do what's
"supposed" to be fun, I should do what I like to do & what I feel
good about doing, which is mostly constructive things.